for PATTAYA TRADER 248 (E)

FORCED-TO-AGREE-OR-FREE-
TO-DISAGREE ?
I am for  Woody Allen
in a filmed comedy
abut a revolution
in a far-off century,
and about a further one
in Cuba, ha ha hee.
The latter called Bananas.
Not every monkey climbs the tree
but even we naked apes -
Adam and Eve, you and me -
like other great apes
can't always seem to agree.
It has been that way
throughout human history.
If you seek dictatorship
start the revolution without me.

for PATTAYA TRADER 248 (D)

HUNTER-SURE-GETS-GENERALLY-GLOBAL-
THUMBS-DOWN-FROM-FRIENDS-TO-THE-NATIONAL-
WILDLIFE-PARK
Cecil, the conservation park lion,
was hunted down to world dismay.
People let's think of him in Heaven...
if chewing on Christians this very day ?!

BRIGHTER-START-TO-THE-DAY ?
I think too much some might say,
but others have to do the thinking
for the many who do not think,
and it stops the mind from shrinking.
I'm sure that those many would think
were their dull heads to start shrink !

VERY-BIG-BOSOM-BUDDIES-
NOW-LUVVIE
Many have been the stars and celebs
from the north who have gone rubbing
up against southern stars and celebs
who'd call them Yorkshire puddings
had they not come to fame
there in London's big city,
where you get to the top
by sucking on sure tough titty !

for PATTAYA TRADER 248 (C)

CARRY ON AHEAD
In the past was the horse
and then the carriage horse-drawn.
Then the motor-carriage
arrived with a new dawn.
Will the motor-carriage -
we commonly call a car -
soon be given wings
to fly beneath the stars?
The future is often magic
we just for granted take.
Sometimes it's a car-crash,
make no damn mistake !

OH MOTHER !
Hey there Minnie Mouse
he left you the house
though you ever took the mickey.
You wanted your guy to go,
he took the dog Pluto.
You take his alimony.
Even your honeymoon
had been a Disney cartoon
and your kids find it funny
your new man has the look
of a total Daffy Duck
who also calls you "Mummy".

FREE-FLOATING-YES
Some poets toe
political-party-lines.
Find I've no foot
within such binds.

A STREETGIRL'S GREETING
Highroad some say
and others highway.
Some people meet
on sidewalk or street.
Goes out to get high
does one down guy.
"Hello" a girl is to greet.
He's right-up-her-street !

DYING-BY-WAR-OR-BOREDOM-YES
Thanks for your point of view
but do not try enforce it.
I see things differently to you.
What you say, I can't endorse it.

Win by argument and not war,
not everyone takes your side.
Self-righteousness find a bore,
a thing from which many have died.

for PATTAYA TRADER 248 (B)

 THE NON-GRADED-GIRL
There is a poison ivy
and there's a deadly nightshade.
I once knew the very girl
for whom both names were made.
When it came to humanity
she didn't get the grade !

for PATTAYA TRADER 248 (A)

DO-NOT-END-UP-BARING-DEAD-BONES !
You bare your bruise
like a tattoo;
you show it off,
where your guy hit you.

Then you turn around
and reveal a scar
as if it is, girl,
a medal of war.

The viewers all shudder.
Your life, don't you risk it ?
Are you and he heavily
into the sadomasochistic ?!

THE DIAMOND-RETURNED-TO-DUST
H. Rider Haggard
was not as haggard as 'She' -
the character he created -
at the end of the story.

No H. Rider Haggard
had other stuff to mine.
His 'She' wasn't such a diamond
at the end of her time.

GIANT PEACHES WERE NOT THE ONLY FRUIT ?
Dahl had his demons.
He called them Gremlins.
They got into the controls
as well as sat on aeroplane wings.
They got into his story,
sure did strange things.
Gave him ideas for which he got no flak,
like Willy Wanker, chocolate factory round back !

for PATTAYA TRADER 247 (E)

THEIR-TWO-GHOSTS-TOGETHER-RIDE ?
Faster than Swift Nick he flew,
king of smugglers John Andrew.
From the hamlet of old Saltburn sped
(Dick Turpin's Black Bess can be read
as a romantic-novel, a fictional-piece).
Coastguards fired at he and beast.
Like lightning galloped his horse
only the moon to light their course.
In a far-off tavern he'd appear.
A lady alibi said "Sure, he was here."
Nobody would believe John could ride
so fast from old Saltburn's seaside
and arrive there at the stated hour
he was seen. No horse had the power.
John was therefore not the man
they thought king of the smuggler-gang.
But his luck was not to last
and into York Castle Prison he was cast.
Some say a nighttime lightning flash
reveals John's ghost in a mad dash.
Others say when the moon's up high
you'll see him ride with his lady alibi
on his way back to old Saltburn gone.
The lovers in the saddle forever one.

DRUGGY-NEVERLAND-GUY
I'm told that he never grew
to maturity
just flew and flew and flew
to his destiny
with the grave; joined Death.
Will he now for ever rest?

for PATTAYA TRADER 247 (D)

OUT-CRIED-AN-IMPERFECT-POT-
FIND-NO?
To the perfect old potter
cried out the new pot
"Sometimes I'm to hold cold stuff
and sometimes to hold hot.
To go rebel against you
I am told we are not.
That we must hold fast
and endure our lot.
They say I must worship
and that I SHALL obey
the perfect old potter
who moulded my clay,
the perfect old potter
who made me this way.
But so many cracked pots
have you not made today ?!"

A-BIG-TOWN-SUNDOWN
Strolling over the green hills
at your very own leisure,
beware the greedy Trolls
and of dragon-guarded treasure.

Take in the emerald hills.
Take in the ruby-red sun
and turn to the poor grey city
on which this ruby goes down.

for PATTAYA TRADER 247 (C)

UPWARD PUSHER
He has friends in high places
if you get my gist.
They couldn't live any lower,
there lies the twist.

Friends in high places
who live in squalor.
Narcs, junkies, drug-addicts,
with a pale-white cloud colour.

SPUR-ALONG-ON-BEANS-ONLY
Spaghetti Western
Clint Eastwood style.
A plate of beans
for this extra mile.

Ride or walk tall
down the street.
The sun is up
but life feels cheap.

YES-TAMPER-WITH-THE-TINY-
TEMPTER-WIZARD-SO-WISE
Wondrously wise wizard
come on step-forth.
Rise up within,
kill the poison dwarf

who whispers temptations
inside the head.
Yes the poison dwarf,
see him dead !

MOUTH MAGIC
Open sesame,
her mouth's a treasure trove,
her tongue-kiss is
the language of love.

CAN-DESTROYING-BE-CREATIVE?
Find destruction
only clears a space
for creation
to take place.

for PATTAYA TRADER 247 (B)

LINES-FOR-A-YORKSHIRE-LASS
Shakespeare
coined words anew,
the sort of thing
poets often do.

Of course,
there's the vernacular
sure found in verses,
aye lass... arrr !

for PATTAYA TRADER 247 (A)

JUST-A-STARDUST-COWBOY-THANKS-TO-
THE-TV-SOAP-SERIES-'I-DREAM-OF-JEANIE' ?
Larry Hagman dreampt of his Jeanie
before becoming J.R.
in a soap opera called Dallas
where he featured the star.
Perhaps Jeanie the lady-genie
had cast a working spell
that made Larry king of the telly?
Who can tell? Yes who can tell?

SPACE OUT ?
Hairy headed he
on air guitar.
The guy's a wannabe
heavy-rock star.

Yes it's by metal
he's so driven.
But thin air realize
his idea of heaven ?

YOUNG IDOLS
I've written lyrics
for many young bands
but it is the music
that grabs the fans

and the songwriters
who do not play
don't get the damn credit
anyway

when young bands
play their old stuff.
Youth needs idols
that are young enough.

PARKIN PIECE
"I was seventy years old,"
she said with a grin,
"picked up on the beach by a guy
very young and slim," -
who drove all night
his Molly Park-in !?

FREEDOM-FROM-DAMN-FORCE
I'm a mingler
and a singler,
a team-player
and lone-wayer.
I can adapt
when not trapped
on one layer.

for PATTAYA TRADER 246 (H)

FROM-RAGGY-JEANS-TO-OFFSHORE-RICHES?
"Think of fortune and not only fame !"
is often the rock and roll band game.
"We can make money as well as a name
and on the record company place the blame.
Play the young rebels, say we're not tame,
on the road to fortune and fame.
The record company will think the same.
We'll both be playing the one game.
I used to be an anti-materialist
but to ultra-capitalism find I enlist !"

HIM-INSIDE-HER
Raging hormones,
erogenous zones,
are under her skin.
Contained within,
almost in her bones
just like him !

IMAGIC ?
Turn water into wine,
walk upon the sea,
you can in your mind
if you can't physically.

Not from another time,
no magic Christian be.
Go do in your mind
what you can't do bodily.

FREE-FISH-FOR-SEABIRDS-SURE
Yes there on a pier down south
a seagull stole - almost in his mouth -
the sandwich he held in his hand
and flew far out from dry land.
It got a tuna sandwich free
as it might many fish it finds at sea !

VERY-JADED-DJ-JIM-PUMPED-UP-
MORE-THAN-THE-VOLUME-YES
"Watch that girl on her trike.
When old enough to ride a bike
round the BBC, with a flat,
Jim'll fix it, you can bet on that !"

LAYING-THE-LADIES-LOW-WITH-THEIR-
ROARING-BAND-SOUNDS
Imprisoned inside a hotel room,
drink and drugs the destroyer.
Music turns to moans and groans
while girl-fans gather in the foyer
and down in the street below.
Boy rock band becomes the voyeur,
noses to the window pressed,
viewing girls only half-dressed.
Tonight the fans will be caressed
with loud sounds from these fellers.

GIVERS-ARE-RECEIVERS?
They who share
can only despair
at those who don't.
It's not those can't,
it's just those shan't,
yes it is those won't.
Some give too much,
some gain too much.
Takers with little care.

FOR-HARD-AND-SOFT-HEARTS-NO?
Shake, yes shake
the rose-tree of Blake,
let the petals fly
pink and soft
as Cupid aloft,
wary of the green eye
of cruel jealousy.

THE NO-GO GRIDLOCK SNAKES
Through the city centre
the motors slowly snake,
get into a gridlock,
yes put on the brake
for a far longer stretch
than tail to gridlock neck.

YOU SO DRAWN TO
Yes like the bear to honey;
like the swan to a lake;
like the moth to a flame;
so to you lady find I take.

OPENING-UP-WIDE
The poet seeks
to expand his own mind
and many others
as to mankind.

for PATTAYA TRADER 246 (G)

DEEP-IN-THE-BOOK-OF-THE-COOL-
LAKELAND-VERSES-AM-I-WRONG?
It's the Lake Poets
you say you adore.
You swim in their verses,
stay clear of the shore.
Swim girl, swim do,
and bill and coo,
the ghost of Dove-Cottage
should like you to.

NO-SONG-FROM-A-LADYFRIEND-
DISTANTLY-FADING
Swan song,
swan song,
then the lady's gone?
So wrong,
so wrong,
she was a mute-swan.

A-TRANSFORMING-TREE-SONG-FIND
Find beauty and the beast
keep company
in a cave close-by
the singing-ringing-tree.

Yes keep company
beast and the beauty
in a cave close-by
the singing-ringing-tree.

If the cave's mouth
could sing a song
and the dying tree
just sing along

no more a beast
would be he,
no more a captive
would be she.
But it is love
shall set them free.

 BUOYED-UP
Tar-black is the night
and the sea black as tar.
The girl beside me
is my guiding star.
The boat rocks,
the bed rocks too.
Wide ocean of emotion,
"I'm a buoyed boy with you !"

for PATTAYA TRADER 246 (F)

THE-LIGHT-AND-THE-DARKNESS-BY-TURNS-TOO
Beowulf tackled the monster Grendel.
Sir Gawain tackled the Green Knight.
The Epic poems turned into Romance.
The world was seen in a new light.
But where there is seen a new light
will soon be seen, too, a new night.

for PATTAYA TRADER 246 (E)

ARABESQUE ANALYSIS
A thousand and one nights,
a thousand and one tales,
but I can see behind
your so very many veils.

You go tell me this, girl,
you go tell me that.
Now let me tell you, princess,
I smell an ugly rat.

What is it that you hide?
You're not a harem wife
with her pretty head to lose.
Find truth can't finish your life.

HUNT-GRUNT
The rich have seldom
anything to protest about,
but the ban on fox hunting
again brings them out.
"The poor I do detest,
they're always at protest,"
had once grunted Lord Snout.

THE-SACRED-HINDU-SEX-QUEEN
The Queen of Kama Sutra
had a sacred mission
to please all her Western men
in her Eastern tradition,
which put many a Western wife
at a great disposition:

"Said he was going to church
did my husband Bobby.
But he met the Kama Sutra Queen
at the temple-of-her-body.
I don't want him back,
he's out on his ear.
Going with that girl's a sin,
let me make it clear."

The Queen of Kama Sutra
was a molten blend
of turbulence and tranquility
for every man and his friend
in many kinds of a way
the wife could not comprehend.
She was to besotted Bobby
a real godsend. A real godsend.

THE-OWEN-AND-WURTHER-WAR-DRAMA
Owen to total wars
doomed youth's the plot.
No way out, young man,
Wurther you like it or not !

for PATTAYA TRADER 246 (D)

SUPER-SUPPER-FOR-A-FIT-GRANNY-
WHO-HAS-LEGGED-IT-NO?
She stole a leg of lamb
and ran the old-lady, ran.
Ran so fast was seen to fly
above the head of the security guy.
She was a supermarket Supergran.

for PATTAYA TRADER 246 (C)

IDENTIFY-DO-FAR-TOO-FAMILIAR-
FAMILIES?
Out in the old
penal colony
that is Australia
many a family
has Shepherd
for a surname
and Errol Flynn -
of film fame -
bit the balls
off of sheep
on a farm,
himself to keep,
before an actor
he became.

THE CHICKEN FACTORY BOY-HAND
The older fowl
at the factory
would try corner
young cock he.
The frisky hens,
when he was young,
down his throat
tried thrust a tongue
or slap his butt.
Young men few.
'White feathers'
and World-War-II.

for PATTAYA TRADER 246 (B)

FAME-WITHOUT-FORTUNE-FIND
Not fortune but fame
is the poet's sole aim.
He wants to be read,
have his poems wide-spread.

THE-TRUE-TASTE-OF-VERSE-SUCCESS
Yes as Sitwell said to Ginsberg,
drugs a true poet doesn't need.
He is his own altered state.
The Muse enters, the poet succeeds.

ISSUE
Bigger tissues
for a bigger sneeze.
Can't we have
bigger condoms please ?!

MORE-HIRED-HANDS
Sick of being sick.
So tired of being tired.
Overworked by a boss
who under-hires.

WEDLOCK-AND-KEY
Divorce is now
a very big thing,
though the gays
are into marrying.
I lived with a woman
when it was a sin.
One man's freedom
find another's chain,
yet divorce is sure
to rise again.

THE-LONE-GUYS-LONG-
AND-SO-HARD-ROAD
He travels, sure travels,
sells to shops his load
of frilly female underwear,
hard-nosing the damn road.

DIVING-WITH-THE-DOLPHIN
Lifts the curtain of night,
let the fish-star perform.
See dive a dolphin
in the so sunshiny-morn.

Put a seashell to your ear
as though it's a telephone.
Listen to a mermaid whisper
"Do come swim in the foam."

for PATTAYA TRADER 246 (A)

LONELY AT THE TOP
On a ledge
and on the edge,
he's up so high.
From the window
down to below
seems a mile.

He will lunge
and will plunge
to the ground.
It's only then
will fellow men
gather round.

THE MAGIC OF YOUTH
You're an old rhino
with a fierce horn.
You have no time
for young unicorns.

LOVE-OR-SEX-VERSE
The love of a good woman
may well be better,
but sex with a bad woman
who is free of fetter
might make you forget
the good female you could not get !

GREEN WITH ENVY RED ?
"Flash cars and finery
I would buy," you say to me,
were you to win the Lottery.
Don't you condemn the wealthy?
Sounds very much like envy !

VICARS-AND-TARTS-FANCY-DRESS-TYPES
The men turned up as vicars.
The girls turned up as tarts
who were wearing no knickers.
Won the partying men's hearts.
We might all turn out in disguise
but underneath's where truth lies !

for PATTAYA TRADER 245 (H)

GENTLEMAN-OR-GIANT-PIG?
Open the door for a lady,
let her first through.
Pull out her chair
in a diner, too,
when you and she
go out for a meal.
Or does a sexist pig
she damn make you feel?

for PATTAYA TRADER 245 (G)

THE FRENCH LANGUAGE LESSON
A click of heels upon the floor -
outside in the school corridor -
then the teacher's at the door
much to her girl-pupils chagrin,
who envy her so shapely pins
while the boy-pupils sit and grin.
She's the apple of every boy's eye,
a French mistress, sigh, sigh, sigh.
Boys think only of football?
Find not at all... not at all !

THE MAIDEN'S MATCH
Bowled a maiden over,
she was just the ticket.
We parted soon after.
You say that's not cricket?
She enjoyed the score
with my middle-wicket !

MORTAL-MORNINGS
Running round the houses
and banging on the doors,
shouting up at the windows
"Wake up, come downstairs !"
his friends sleep in till late
there on the council estate.

They stay up most the night,
sleep in till nearly afternoon,
play their music too loud
and howl at the moon.
A needle like a vampire's tooth
then sure drains their very youth.

IN-YOUR-END-OH !
Very large chest for sale
advertised in shady Soho.
A set of loose drawers too -
for those in the know.
Ladies of the night
and their innuendo !

for PATTAYA TRADER 245 (F)

A-DAREDEVIL-DRIVER-LADY'S-
NOW-SO-OVER-AND-DONE-DAYS
The girl was a New Ager
nor an old hippie.
She was a super-tramp,
a motorized-gypsy
who drove a painted-wagon,
drove a cosmic-caravan,
and drank from a flagon
or rather a demijohn.

The girl was a stranger,
an otherworldy sort.
Wild-rose of the highway,
a spaced-out cosmonaut
who drove a painted-wagon,
drove a cosmic-caravan,
and drank from a flagon
or rather a demijohn.
A dusky looking lass
whose daring days are done.

for PATTAYA TRADER 254 (E)

EDWIN-AND-HILDA
He gave his name to Edinburgh
where sits King Arthur's Seat.
He united Britain's divided kingdoms
whom first he was to defeat
when from out of exile
he with an army came.
He had a wizard at his side.
King Edwin was the hero's name.
He took himself a French lady
who was of the Merovingian line.
A semi-secret society kept
all Britain's kingdoms in one bind.
Though a flesh and blood Saxon
to the people he was divine.
Along with his great-niece baptized,
held firmly to his pagan roots his mind.
When he lost his head in battle
he was buried near Whitby's sea,
just his head stayed in York's Chapel
where folk would go worship he.
His great-niece was the Abbess
you may know as the saint Hilda.
She was a former Hildegard.
Fish-tailed some had willed her.
Yes a magical mermaid was willed she,
as though the noble line were of Merovee?

IT'S-WHAT-THE-FORTUNE-TELLER-FORETOLD-
OF-THE-COLD-VIKING-OR-NORMAN-INVASIONS
"The Vikings are coming
from across the wide sea.
Poets, fishermen, farmers,
who've turned to piracy.
The Vikings are coming,
men of the North or Norse,
their boats on the back
of each waves white horse.
Yes the Vikings are coming
from across the wide sea.
They'll take part of Gaul
and call it Normandy.
A conqueror shall be born there -
oh heed my prophecy -
and come to conquer
all Britain will he.
The Vikings are coming
and some shall stay.
Many of our gods
will be cast away
as to our isle the Vikings come
and dawn a new Druid's blood-red sun."

for PATTAYA TRADER 254 (D)

EVER BOUND
I hear that love
came calling round.
You opened the door,
it threw you down.
You hoped one day
it would lift you up,
but it is hard,
love is hard you've found.

Yes I hear that love
came calling round;
knocked on the door,
threw you to the ground.
You hoped one day
it would free you up,
but it has tied,
love has tied, has bound.

And now he wants
to buy a ring
just when you wish
an end to everything.
Yes now he wants
to buy a ring
just when you wish
an end to everything.
Bound together, for ever.
Bound together, for ever.

for PATTAYA TRADER 254 (C)

SO-HAPPY-JUMPS-JACK
Yes spring-heeled Jack,
he was seen out back.
Went over the wall,
sprang-down the track
this May morn, at dawn's crack.
I bet come June
he'll be over the moon.

A-KIPLING-KIND-
TRIPPER-TIPPLER
It's heated-India
he thinks he's in
when he drinks down
the gunga gin !

for PATTAYA TRADER 254 (B)

'TWAS-A-TOWERING-TWO-
IN-ART-CITY
Up the Eiffel Tower
looking on down,
a boy and a girl
far-off the ground,
heads in the clouds,
dizzy with youth,
and I a poet
questing for truth,
like a knight
in search of a grail,
in Paris, ah Paris,
a real fairytale !

for PATTAYA TRADER 254 (A)

VULNERABLE-VERSE
He wore his heart upon his sleeve.
That must have been the guy's charm.
Girls sure walked all over him,
broke the heart upon his arm.

for PATTAYA TRADER 253 (H)

A-GOING-GOLD-AND-SILVER-
VERSE-GUYS?
To a reddish-gold
the leaves now turn.
In yellowy-flames
they shall burn
when bonfires built
men go ignite
and into the air
smoke shall alight
in a greyish-blue
with a silvery-hue.

A-GLOBAL-GOLD-FOR-
A-FREED-FISH
The gypsy's crystal ball
was a goldfish-bowl.
To the top was to swim
the tiny-carp therein.
"Tides shall go rise,
let it be no surprise
that towns will fall
as the seas flood all
with a justly wild rage.
This - for me - a golden age !"

CUTTING CARDBOARD
A cardboard box home, find,
had the guy on the piss,
till he got the message
he wasn't cut-out for this.

POETRY-OR-POLITICS?
Political Correctness
nor party-politics
can restrict the poet
who the truth elicits.

SLAVERY-VERSE
The Jews enslaved,
Greeks and Romans too.
American Indians
and Africans. Who
has not enslaved -
we free may ask -
over the chain of years,
over the centuries past.

FREEDOMS-AND-TAKERS-
OF-LIBERTIES-FIND-DO
I know no boundaries,
find my mind's so tall
it strides over
every countries walls.

But there are borders
in need of protection
from high-wall despots
and their people-collection.

A-DAMN-OLD-CRONE
There is a seabird
upon the cliff
and in the town
there is a witch.

There is a cormorant
called the shag
and there's a witch
I call a hag.

Hag, hag, yes hag,
sure is she.
Ship with crow's-nest
take her out to sea !

YES-IT'S-A-CAPITAL-FARE-
FOR-A-LOWER-CASE-DUDE
When catching a cab
the guy's sure found
that they give him
the runaround.

As if a tourist
it is the long way
that they take him.
It ups their pay.

They bide their time
a bigger fare to unravel.
There in London town
it is Gullible's Travels.

for PATTAYA TRADER 253 (G)

WHEN-SO-DRUGGY-DRAGON-DREAMS-
TURN-TO-KNIGHTMARES
By George, by George,
his life he's disgracing.
He lances his flesh
and goes dragon chasing.

Says it makes him feel
a kind of hero.
My-oh-my, my-oh-my,
goodbye George, cheerio.

for PATTAYA TRADER 253 (F)

A-CAREER-IN-CRIME
There'll always be those
who are work-shy,
who want to be carried
by the other guy.

There'll always be those
who idle-away
yet still want the things
bought with big-pay.

They sign on the dole,
rob rich and poor,
scorn the workers
and still want more.

There'll always be those
without the backbone
to carry their own weight,
but moan and groan.