Tuesday, April 30, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 182 (E)

A COMIC'S CANON
The papists he truly upset.
The IRA posed him a threat.
A thinking man
and comedian,
Dave Allen's jokes they didn't get !

Friday, April 26, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 182 (D)

A-FASHION-FACTORY-CUTIE-
FOR-SURE
Just like Edie Sedgwick -
product of a damn Factory -
hold up to yourself a candlestick,
feel melt the plasticity.
It's not your tears, girl, leave tracks;
it's plastic dripping like hot-wax !

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 182 (C)

IT'S-THE-FLAT-EARTHERS'-
MENTALITY-FIND
Many believed the earth was flat.
Now round-and-wheeling we find we're at.
Some think that they know it all.
They're in the world, not on the ball.

AWED-SOME-BY-ORSON
The guy was awesome
and in more ways than one.
A man in movies was Orson.
Voice-over to a beer advert
he ended-up. Drink does hurt !

Monday, April 22, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 182 (B) correction

DUST-TO-DUST
The word was BANG
and came into being
the starry-fine cosmos
we now are seeing.

We are interconnected
in the explosive thrust.
Man is created from
particles of stardust.

REPATRIATION?
White: "Go back where you came from."
Black: "I was born in Birmingham."
White: "Go back where you came from."
Black: "You mean inside my mum?"

OWN-TAX-CUTTER-
WAS-BRETCH?
Bertolt Bretch
wrote about knifeman Mack
for The Three Penny Opera.
"Did not pay his tax,"
it's said of Bretch.
Paid not hic cut, this man of the Left?

for PATTAYA TRADER 182 (B)

Friday, April 19, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 182 (A)

MAD-MADAM-MERIT?
Feminists looked for a leg-up
from Maggie the meriter?
Can't they see this should have been meritless?
No feminist was PM Thatcher.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 181 (F)

A-KITING-KITTEN?
A tall bat
and long-legged-cat,
both of them met.
The Batman
and the Catwoman,
a Bat-Kitten beget?!

BODY-ROBBERS
Burke was a berk,
left at home his spade.
And Hare raced off
when from a grave
a ghostly voice came.
They sure were a-shake:
"Dig very-deep, duo,
your bodies I await !"

Monday, April 8, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 181 (E)

WITH-EDDIE-DID-
WALLY-HEAD-OFF
What a damn wally.
Sure was a wally, Wallace.
Off with Ed, off with Ed,
Eddie of the palace;
to meet Nazis, to meet Nazis,
meet men of malice.
Pass the king, pass the king,
pass him the poisoned-chalice !

THE-WORKSHY-WASTER-
HE-SURE-IS
He knows all about wild-women
and can organise a piss-up in a brewery,
so he does have some talents.
Though "What A Waste" sang Ian Dury !

No, there is not a one
can say that he is not sharp.
The piss-head belongs in politics
or a poem by John Cooper-Clarke !

Friday, April 5, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 181 (D)

A BRIEF HISTORY
OF YOUTH
When he was a hippy
he was far too trippy.
When he was a punk
he was too skunk-drunk.
Now an old-goth, he's very-tired;
lies in his coffin, so-vampired.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 181 (C)

A JINGLE/JANGLES BIT
The Jinglin' Geordie?
Yes I know him.
Did a gig together,
and some drinking !
'Mr Bojangles'-
a song some sing -
had a dog, no beer-can,
unlike Jinglin' !
A beer and verse
ever at hand,
the Jinglin' geordie
of Northumberland.

YES-A-SURE-SHADY-
RICH-MAN'S-DESIRES
The jaded and the debauched
are among the high and the low,
paradoxically there's the lowest, find,
the higher that you go.
Riches can  buy you anything?
Not protection from the shadows that grow.

DECLARING-DUTIFUL-RESPECT-
TO-FAR-EASTERN-BEAUTY
Here it is men pay their rents -
in bars filled with drinkers and decadents -
for Siam ladies for the night or day,
hot almost as a Chinese-takeaway.
Had these suns upon them smiled
in a dream, then Byron and Wilde
might have found a way to them.
Raise a glass to the girls, ghostly-gentlemen !

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

for PATTAYA TRADER 181 (B)

KARMICLY-KNOWING-
ONLY-NOW?
To lose your memory
like a hat or headdress?
To forget your identity,
to start anew, begin afresh
like somebody who's been reborn?
Latent past-leanings to leave you torn?

THE-CLUB-CLUBHOUSE
The polar-bear cub
met the wooden-club.
The seal cub met
the wooden-club too.
There are men who club
together, to go club
these poor babe creatures.
Maybe these men belong in a zoo?

NOT-THE-CONDOM-
CATHOLIC-BOY-HE?
She's a big girl now -
with her many own minions -
who sure likes to dress
in the clothes of St Trinians
when playing bedroom games.
Yes when plaing bedroom games !
Her husband is a dirty-Johnny
went to school at St James.

KNOCKER-OF-COLLECTIVIST-
KNOCKERS-I
People are out campaigning,
they've put on their walking boots.
They are seeking numbers,
strength in new recruits.
Religious sects and politicians
are knocking on our doors,
as varying as are individuals
"Oh come and join our cause !
We are right, sure right.
Find others wrong, sure wrong."
My voice I will not add
to their self-righteous collective-song.