THE-PRIVATE-DETECTIVE-IN-
A-NOW-FAR-OFF-PATTAYA
Once upon a time in Pattaya
there was a Private Dick
who was hired by a farang
to tail his girlfriend Lek.
He followed her to where
two suspect guys she met -
a Tom and a Harry named -
at the bar called The Candlewick.
The bar-girls there burned
the candle at both ends.
She spent the entire night
with her two suspect friends.
Now, all the minor gods
from the fields and forests around
would tell you that the city
had sinful sights and sounds.
And it is not a fairy story
Pattaya's a fantasy for grown men,
or that those who come here
do so again and then again.
SIAMESE-MOSQUITOS-AND-
WHIRLWIND-ROMANCE?
Young land of the free,
offspring of old-Siam.
Thailand hits like a tsunami.
Pattaya's palms, sea and sand.
Here girls swarm like flies,
come from far and wide.
Bangkok and Chiang Mai,
and from the countryside.
Come to Pattaya and Jomtien
their fortunes out to seek.
Many to find a wealthy man
or work in bars on every street.
Some are long-legged mosquitos
who blood wish to drain.
Some are romantic-tornadoes.
You'll never foot the ground again.
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